Ok Pinterest, I do like you. A lot. I’m kind of obsessed with you to be honest, considering I spend a good chunk of time every day scouring your pages for Pinspiration, admiring your giant collection of “best ever, ridiculously easy, and delicious” recipes for creamy chicken, chocolate cake, and cheesy chip dip. I have found some worthwhile recipes thanks to you, and home decorating tips, and dresses that I’ll never buy, but I have to say you’re kind of a bad friend. You spend half your time trying to convince me to make ooey-gooey Oreo peanut-butter brownie sundae cakes and the other half telling me the fifteen best ab workouts I need to do to get a flat belly because you know that I ate more of the peanut-butter Oreo cake than I was supposed to. You show me pictures of sports bra-clad athletes, tanned and toned, to inspire me to work harder at perfecting my body. You mix in some recipes for “skinny enchiladas” and “skinny mac n’ cheese” with photos of giant slabs of New York cheesecake and red velvet cupcakes. You show me outfits to “color me happy and skinny,” so I know that the two must go hand in hand. You caption every heavy, cheesy, beefy dish with “your husband won’t let you make anything else ever again.” Stop, please. I don’t cook only to please the man in my life.
I have to admit, Pinterest, you are letting me down. You’re leading me on with these attention-grabbing one-liners (are these written by the same people who write the ads on the side of websites, like, “5 foods to never eat for a flat belly”?) and you’re talking at me like I’m just another person in the crowd that will get swept up in the masses and believe whatever I’m told. I feel lost and consumed in the Internet jumble, losing hours of my day constantly scrolling down in search of the next snapshot of visual gratification, so that when I finally escape your hold, Pinterest, I feel hungry, fat, and confused. Should I go make that cake or do “15 best ab workouts without crunches”?
Alright, I’ve gone a little bit overboard I’ll admit, blaming you for my inability to separate the good from the ugly. I should have the strength to pry myself away when my eyes are glued to the screen and I should have the confidence to ignore those eat-yourself-skinny pins that wallpaper my homepage. I’m a grown up, most days. The only way I know to combat your manipulation is honesty. I will make that recipe and tell the Internet audience how absolutely delicious it wasn’t (if of course it actually wasn’t) and I will tell you that losing 7 pounds in 3 days is not physically healthy. I won’t abandon you yet, Pinterest, but I don’t know how much I can rely on you anymore.
In that state of mind, here’s a recipe I found on Pinterest for no-sugar, vegan, can be made gluten free “cookies.” After I made them, I was informed by the man in my life that they aren’t cookies, but I didn’t make them to please him and I didn’t make them to “eat myself skinny” just because they’re gluten free and so therefore they must be healthy (calm down, Erin. Deep breaths). I made them out of my own curiosity and interest so there. Make them if you want, or don’t.
Banana-Oatmeal Raisin Bites
Adapted from katinthekitch.wordpress.com
3 ripe bananas, well mashed (about 1.5 cups)
1 tsp. vanilla extract
¼ cup canola oil, olive oil, or coconut oil (liquid)
2 cups rolled oats
2/3 cup almond meal
1/3 cup desiccated unsweetened coconut
½ tsp. cinnamon
½ tsp. Kosher salt
1 tsp. baking powder
½ cup dried fruit – raisins or Cherries
Preheat oven to 350. In a large bowl combine bananas, oil, and vanilla. In another small bowl combine all dry ingredients. Add to banana mixture and stir in. Add dried fruit. The dough won’t hold together super well, but don’t worry about it. Drop the dough onto parchment lined cookie sheets an inch apart (they don’t spread at all) and bake for about 15 minutes until lightly browned on the bottoms and somewhat firmer. My batch made about 2 dozen, but it just depends how big you make them.